Dani & Ben

Dani & Ben

Now that Dani’s flight to visit Ben in the UK is canceled, they’re dealing with long-distance relationship problems and solutions with humor and a positive focus.

Dani met Ben through a mutual friend, who was working in Serbia for a year, in Dani’s company. Ben came to visit his friend several times and they all occasionally went out together in Belgrade.

“One night, while we were drinking, he tried to jokingly seduce me by telling me he personally knew Benedict Cumberbatch. I had mentioned that I was a big fan, so Ben told me he went out drinking with Benedict every weekend.

I pretended to believe him just for fun, so the joke continued. Even after he went back to the UK, we kept in touch through a Whatsapp group with our friends, with a series of random stuff.

It wasn’t until I ended my previous relationship that we started texting more frequently and eventually decided to go out on a real date when he came back to Serbia, in September 2018.

His whole holiday in Serbia was really fun; we spent 5 days together and Ben spent almost three hours making a list to plan out our mutual visits. I was really impressed with the effort!

In October, I went to Bali with a friend. Due to unpredicted circumstances, I had to spend the first two days alone on the island waiting for my friend to join, so Ben kept me company through video calls every evening. I was really grateful for that.

I realized we’d been texting and calling each other every day and that I really liked telling him about everything that happened throughout the day. He didn’t seem to be bored at all, even though he wasn’t an active participant in that. He was a great listener.

At the end of 2018, I ended up getting a 6-month visa for the UK, so I was able to visit him. After that visa expired, he came to Serbia more frequently and by the end of this year, I re-applied for a 2-year visa. It was a super long and painful process, but I finally got the approval.

I booked several trips to the UK this year and managed to pull off the first one, but then Corona took its toll. One of the April flights got canceled and we are still waiting to see how the situation develops. Hopefully, this will all end soon enough.”

Dani & Ben’s Long-Distance Relationship Problems and Solutions

“Nothing has changed that much between us (except for the visits) but things will get back to normal soon enough. We have both been spending a lot more time at home and we discovered new ways to do fun long-distance relationship activities. Sometimes it’s just the two of us, sometimes it’s a group with friends.

So instead of roaming around outside, we are now watching movies inside or organizing group games or quizzes. I think this situation has brought people together, in a way. Even though we are physically distant, things have not changed for us emotionally.

Socializing used to be a big part of our life. We both spent a lot of time with our friends outside working hours, in pubs or cafes. Depriving us of that took a bit of a toll on our mental well-being. Now, even taking simple walks or going to the supermarket feels weird because you need to avoid everyone and it just doesn’t feel right.

So after a while, you start to get cabin fever and it can get put you in a weird place, mentally. I do have a positive influence on Ben since I am a bit better at coping with things by myself, so I try to affect him positively and focus on that, instead of the negative stuff that is going on. 

Laughter is definitely the best medicine, so don’t take yourselves or anything too seriously and try to make a joke out of things, to cope with them in a better way.”

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